Last of the Flock

This is one of the most painful posts I have ever written

but I feel like I need to get it out ~ document it and my thoughts and feelings

strange really since the world of social media has not been something 

I have been keeping up on the past week or so

other than a couple of Instagram posts and some time spent on Facebook

a week ago Friday my father in law ~ Lee was not feeling well

he had pain in his back and was taken to the hospital by ambulance

things went from bad to worse on Saturday and on Sunday morning

he passed away

it was sudden and honestly I think we are all still in shock

the doctors have no idea what happened other than he had a very bad infection set it

we will not know any more until the autopsy results come back 

the middle child of 5 ~ and the last one to go

over the past I heard the term used more than one

"he was the last of the flock called home"

saying goodbye to this man that welcomed me into the family from day one

that treated me like a daughter

stepped up when my own father passed away

was heartbreaking to me

he was full of life ~ teasing in a way only he could

I loved him so

my boy's heart is broken ~ I know how the pain feels

when you heart physically hurts

I am here for him and will stand by his side

give him his space when he needs it and will wrap him in a hug when he needs that too

in good times and in bad

he was there for me and now it is my turn

he told me on Sunday that now he knows how I felt

all those years ago

maybe I had to go through it first so I can help him now

so thankful for this last family photo taken on Good Friday this year

it was my birthday ~ we were celebrating Easter

surrounded by family ~ it was a very good Friday indeed

2001 ~ our wedding day

Lee with his 2 boys

one from the archives of he and Barb

it is one of my favourites

Sunday morning when we left the hospital 

we went straight to his parent's place

I was out in the garage ~ wandering and looking at all the stuff hanging on the walls

I stopped and looked at the clock hanging there

the time was stopped at almost the precise time he took his last breath

coincidence ~ maybe

but I choose to believe that he stopped in

on his way to heaven.

we had visitation on Thursday night and the funeral was yesterday

so many people ~ he was a man that was well loved

and admired

stories were told, tears were shed and laughter could be heard

it was a true celebration of his life

and after a beautiful service that fit him to a T

and a small reception ~ we went to the cemetery

and said our final goodbyes

a little later on that day ~ we raised our glasses

there is now a void in our lives that can never be filled

Rest In Peace Lee ~ I will miss you like crazy

xo

Circle of Life

Today is usually a hard day

because you see I miss my Daddy just a little bit more 

than usual 

 

but there are no more tears

only smiles as I flipped through some photo albums

and decided which ones to scan and show

the man that was Dave ~ my Dad

the one of the 2 of us is from my best friend's wedding

back in 1987

all pink and in pearls ~ yes ~ that is moi

 

this is him at his finest ~ it was hard to find one of him

without his tongue stuck out

he was a sassy one!

 

one of Mom & Dad

you know it almost broke my heart this morning

when she wrote on facebook that she lost her best friend

12 years ago today

she has never gotten over his death

and never moved on although we have given her the green light

time and again

she is just not interested....

this is a classic Christmas morning shot

the helmet paraphernalia he has on his head

was for cutting wood ~ protection when using the chain saw

did he ever wear it in the woods ~ I cannot recall

but we had fun with it that morning

a shot of him and Gina ~ she used to call him

her "Elvis"

this was from their 30th wedding anniversary

we threw a surprise party for them

and it was so much fun

this is taken in the old kitchen at the farm

and one of my very favorite shots of him.

I titled this post the circle of life because I know that time marches on

and we are born to die

I do not dwell in the past 

but on 3 days of the year I allow myself to really remember

to look at pictures and listen to sad songs

and think about what if....  what if he was still here

and on those days ~ miss him a little more than usual

On January 6th, 2012 my cousin's daughter had a little girl

and her name is Ava

she turns one today and she is a little angel ~ she really is

so time will continue to march on
and I will carry the memories of my Dad
in my heart forever.

xo

Friday Potpourri

It's Friday

and I made it...

I am slowly getting Christmas all packed up

and my house back to normal

why oh why is it so much harder to take down

than it was to put out??

Molly is back to normal

with no ill effects that we can see

little bugger ~ back in her crate while we are out

I would much rather her be cooped up all day

than worry and stew wondering what kind of trouble

she is getting into at home!

today marks 11 years

but I am trying not to dwell on it this year

I will take some time to reflect

and remember

and smile

maybe I will even sing one of his favorite songs

little smiling faces

after all of the decorations

are banished from the house

I will cozy up with a blanket

and a cup of tea

and enjoy the rest of the week-end

missing you Dad ~ maybe today a little more than usual

I keep the memories in my heart

and love you still...

Have a wonderful week-end.

xo

Friday Potpourri

Hello lovelies

I am feeling the love this morning

the sun is shining

the birds are singing

it is a perfect spring morning

sheets are ready to go on the line

now if I could only stay home and enjoy the day

it would be perfect

this week-end is going to be a busy one

with all the anniversary celebrations

for the fire department

then I have to pop into an open house

as a dear friend's parents

is also celebrating 50 years

of wedded bliss

then of course Sunday is Father's Day

and I always go to the cemetery to plant

on this week-end

but unfortunately this year

there is no time

but I think

Dad would understand...

I will be spending Sunday at the camp

celebrating my father in law

Lee

a retired train engineer

and always there when I need him

and missing my Daddy like crazy.

Hope you all had a sunshiny week

and that the week-end is filled with laughter

and good times.

Happy Father's Day to all the Dad's out there

don't forget to give them a hug

and hold on with all your might.

 

xo

Missing You...

doing some reflecting

and remembering

feeling a little sad

but trying not to get down

my supercouple would have celebrated 47 years

of wedded bliss yesterday

1998

and tomorrow it will be 10 years

since my Daddy went to heaven

tough week

we put a memorial in the paper this year

Looking back today it is hard to imagine

that 10 years have gone by

you will forever be a part of our lives

as we hold back tears and try not to cry

You left us peaceful memories

your love is still our guide

and though we cannot see you

you are always at our side

Thinking about the good times

remembering the good and forgetting the bad

you left a loving family and many friends behind

and we shall reunite with you in due time

Always missed and forever in our hearts.

why does it still hurt so much??

I feel like my heart is being squeezed out of my chest

it's not like this all the time

thankfully

I do not dwell on his last days

hours or minutes

because I was there at the end

I do remember the good times

laughing ~ singing

he loved to sing

that's where I get it from

miss you Dad

xo